Li’l Miss Vampire Can’t Suck Right – Episode 1

What’s it about? Transfer student Ishikawa Luna instantly becomes the most popular girl in school thanks to her cool, mysterious aura. Compared to Ohtori, who’s practically a background character, Luna stands out, making her mark all around the school. They exist in two different social circles: at least until Ohtori discovers that Luna is a vampire who’s terrible at sucking blood!

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Anime has had its fair share of vampire rom-coms over the past  decade, and Li’l Miss Vampire Can’t Suck Right is another entry trying for a twist angle. It’s in the title: this is the story of a vampire who can’t do the one thing vampires are meant to do: drinking blood to sustain themselves. How she sustains herself is a mystery, given blood is kind of important for vamps.

But that’s all for us to find out in the premiere. It’s spooky season, we’ve got a vampire anime, and I’m ready to dive in. Let’s just hope that this is a treat, and not a trick!

Episode 1 immediately reveals Luna’s secret: that she’s a vampire who, at first glance, pretty obviously isn’t human. I mean, she’s got a little visible fang, pointed ears, slightly slitted eyes, and a penchant towards flirting with girls. That’s a vampire if I’ve ever seen one. Still, her classmates don’t see it, resulting in new student Luna coming across more as an aloof cool girl than anything else.

Enter Ohtori, a student so close to being a background character he has eyes that nearly don’t exist and simple characterization. Kid doesn’t even have a visible mouth most of the time. But this is a veneer of sorts. You see, just like Luna, he’s got hidden depths, and they come out as his relationship to Luna blooms.

When they end up on cleaning duty together, worlds collide as Ohtori realizes he may be key to helping Luna with her major problem—not being able to suck blood properly despite needing to sustain herself with more than just sweet treats and snacks.

This is such an intentionally quirky world. Luna is actually not all that unusual because the city of Kashinokidai is home to everything from yokai to robots to, of course, a transfer vampire. And while students joke about letting Luna suck their blood, it probably wouldn’t be all that unusual if she asked and they consented. That’s just the kind of place this city is, which provides the perfect setting for this supernatural slice-of-life romantic comedy to just kind of be everyday student hijinks.

Still, Luna stands out amongst her classmates as being put on a pedestal. Students of all genders idolize her, especially those who know the not-so-secret secret of her vampirism. Naturally, this is juxtaposed against Ohtori, a student who is so plain he doesn’t even fit the art style in terms of his design. But this forms the start of an oddball meet-cute. So when Ohtori, a student who never would have thought Luna would talk to him, is forced into proximity with him, things naturally get complicated—and honestly, kind of cute.

I found this refreshing because this is just kind of a perfect middle ground for a series with low stakes (pardon the unintentional pun, vampire readers) and very little sexualization despite how monster girls often get depicted in anime. In fact, this is more of a dressing down of Luna as a vampire. She might seem cool, but in reality, she’s just kind of a big goofball who can’t properly utilize her fangs and relies on tons of snacks for sustenance.

My one complaint? I don’t like that Luna turns into a chibi character when she sucks blood. It’s weird and it feels infantilizing in an anime that otherwise is actually pretty okay. It’s clear that this is an indicator of how bad Luna is at sucking blood, but…I don’t know, it feels like the strange opposite of sexualizing blood sucking. Hope this fades away because it’s just uncomfortable in a way I can’t describe.

I found Li’l Miss Vampire Can’t Suck Right  to be pretty okay. It’s a solid B anime that fills out a season where there’s a lot of good, a lot of bad, and a lot in the middle. I’m not sure I’ll keep up with it, simply because there’s just so many other shows I want to focus on, but I sense that this will be one I binge a couple of episodes of every few weeks this fall.

My verdict? This is perfectly fine viewing for someone looking to have a very neutral anime watching experience about two oddball students and their everyday life. This isn’t a must watch, but definitely a bingeable watch: check in on it every few weeks for an hour or so of shutting your mind off and enjoying a bit of fun during the spookiest time of the year.